Wednesday, September 24, 2008

Triggers

Life has a funny way of checking in with us to see if we are on our game.

It seems when you have been sailing along smoothly, the wind will suddenly stop. There isn't a storm.  No crashing waves.  Just a pause.  The same lovely sunny, cloudless day.  

I recently came to terms with myself on an aspect of my life and it has been exhilarating!  I hadn't been on a quest to resolve anything or make a decision ~ I just awoke one day to a new realization and have been smiling ever since.  And, of course, in typical Karen fashion, I've openly and freely shared with friends and acquaintances.

la la-la la-la la-la ...

And then, when recently I was walking down the street on a lovely morning sharing my new 'life insight' with a friend...wham-o!  My words had not even finished passing through my lips when, there it was ... life checked in with me.  At those moments, we know very well why life tries to ascertain our stance.  And we find ourselves denying our denial.

Which always sets off a chain of events ... 

Seven years ago, I ended my sabbatical in Europe with an email to friends answering everyone's questions.  Several had asked what was my most profound moment.  I'll never forget that moment nor being so emotionally shaken that "It made me clearly see four things I needed to remove from my life in order to receive what I want the most."  Since my stroll down the street on that gorgeous morn, I've thought about that time seven years ago and those four things.  Three have been gone from my life.  And the fourth...  The fourth.  I've 'tried' & 'tried' to remove the fourth.  And I've fought myself the entire time.  

So life checks in again, now, to see if I'll take the step allowing myself to have what I deny that I want.

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